Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
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