craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
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