I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
