and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Randomize
