i think i have two assholes
no you cant smoke seaweed
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
