he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
Randomize
