I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
where are you?
Hypothermia
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize
