is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
she peed on how many people?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
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