Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Masturbated before I came into work and now the finger scanner won't clock me in. Fuck Valentines Day.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I told her I'd rather set my hair on fire than sleep with her again. In retrospect, that was probably too harsh. My eye is still swollen shut.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize