therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
