She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
This is the 4 year anniversary of the last time I shit my pants. Let's get drunk...
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
Randomize
