Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
Randomize
