Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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