If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
