well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
