Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
your like the ambassador to my penis.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
