Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
