I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
