I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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