booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Randomize
