Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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