she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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