What a fucking waste of an outfit
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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