That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
his roommates stood outside the locked door reading bible verses to us the whole time...
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I was just going for a one night stand and now I'm at breakfast with his entire family.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize