every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Just puked most of my soul out..
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
