the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize