Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
ALERT: Turns out when I'm drunk I turn into a clepto. I just found keys, a ketchup bottle, and sweatshirt in my backpack that don't belong to me. If yours, come collect from me. I'm still drunk in the back of biology lecture.
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
