He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
do herpes really smell.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
