U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
