I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
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