i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize