i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
Randomize
