If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Just to be a PITA after I die, my will leaves 1 cent to each of my FB friends. I hate my lawyer.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
Randomize
