told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
