I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
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