careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
how do flat chested girls get laid?
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
There are leaves in my underwear?
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
