Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
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