i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
life lesson #151: dont let people go batshit crazy and stab you in the knee
i will live by this rule
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
