I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
if i can run in heels then i can drive
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Hello, the Less Drunk that has my sister's phone. I am the Moderately Drunk. I am questioning your Friday activities. Why are you not the More Drunk?
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Randomize
