we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
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