is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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