Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
Randomize
