remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
I wish i was in the wii world.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
You ate ashes out of my bong
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
