Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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