did you hook up austin?
No! he threw up in my bathroom, made me wake up and order him jimmy johns, beat my roommate with a macaroni and cheese box, and then passed out with her in her bed
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Randomize
