I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
where are my pants?
in the oven.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
He climbed on the counter and announced it was time for something called The Cocktacular and all the girls immediately left. He cockblocked the entire fraternity!
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