I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Randomize
