I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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