allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Randomize
