white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize